Two Kinds of Relationships [are fixed and perfected by repetition]
- personal – established and organized by habits
- social – established by custom
The actions you apply to yourself in reaction to your titled position in the relationship
i.e. wife = cooks, teacher = lectures, doctor = bad handwriting, etc.
“Human beings need norms to guide and direct their behavior, to provide order and predictability in social relationships and to make sense of and understanding of each other’s actions.”
The actions you apply to yourself in reaction to your emotional tie in the relationship
i.e. Stuttering when talking to Tom, Always saying sorry to Mary, Takes offensive at everything Julie says
To Be More Specific….
Four Attachment Styles
- Secure Attachment
- Has positive view about self and others
- Dismissing Attachment
- Has positive views about self, but negative of others
- Preoccupied Individuals
- Has negative view about self, but positive of others
- Fearfully Attached
- Has negative view about themselves and others
Be aware if your actions are your own or culturally anticipated. Neither is bad or good, they just are. Having an awareness of actions allows you a better control and flexibility of self.